Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Nora - Two Months

Two Months (Already!)

Oh where has the time gone?  Yesterday I was packing up some of Nora's newborn clothes to give to our neighbors (who just welcomed baby Abby on Monday), and that bittersweet wave came over me. Charley and I are planning on being a family of four, so it is a sad to think that we are done with the newborn phase for good.  Most of the clothes were Riley's as well, and it just felt like I was packing away these precious memories. Having a newborn join a family is incredibly difficult, but it simultaneously one of the most joyous, emotional and tender times of your life.  

And my apologies for the formatting of the photos... 



 




Around 6 weeks, Nora clearly transitioned into babyhood.  I remember being told during a childbirth class with Riley that the 6 week mark after having a baby is the light at the end of the tunnel.  The fog of sleeplessness, recovery and fussiness starts to lift, and your newborn starts to become a real person... and it is true!  I feel amazing and almost back to normal, and Nora, for a lack of a better word, is opening up.  It is like her face is starting to take shape (and those alien-like features - no offense kiddo - are disappearing) and her body is starting to fill out and become less fragile.  Those precious rolls on her legs are starting to appear!  And the best part is she is starting to smile.  It is hard to get at the moment, but every once in a while when she isn't tired, hungry or fussy, her eyes will lock on my face or Charley's (and even Riley's!) and she will just light up with a grin.  Those are the moments.





Nora went through a rough patch where she would cry inconsolably for hours, especially in the evening.  She seems to be getting better at the moment, thank goodness.  

The evenings are still tough in the Poole household though.  Nora typically is exhausted at that point because she doesn't really take naps, and needs to be held.  And at the same time, Riley is ready for a bath and bed which is no easy task.  It is probably comical to watch me try to put them down on my own...  If Charley isn't around to take one, it usually looks something like this: I set Nora down thinking she's asleep, and go try to put Riley to sleep.  As I try and get her down, Nora starts screaming and Riley starts to say "Okay? Okay? Inkie? Inkie?" (translation - is she okay? does she need a binkie?).  I then put Riley in her crib and she starts to scream while I calm Nora down... then the process starts all over until one of them gets tired of crying and actually conks out, or I end up pulling the plug and bringing Riley back downstairs until Charley gets home. It is how I get my cardio.

This juggling act is insane. I think it is tough because I want so desperately to spend quality time with both, but my attention truly is divided.  I just hope I am eventually able to find time to play with Riley and provide her with the right amount of love and discipline while also savoring this sweet time with Nora. 

Riley and Nora are just precious together.  Although Riley sometimes gets angry when I am giving attention to the baby (she tells me to set her in the swing or put her "nigh night" so that my arms free up), she is adorable with her.  She gives her kisses, gives her pacifiers and blankets, gets worried when she cries, and has even started pretending to change her diaper.  The other day she put on the cover that I wear when I nurse Nora, and then asked to hold her...  she pretended to nurse the baby!  A little odd, but kind of cute.





I can't believe we are already starting to see their relationship form.  I love that they will have each other.
























So all in all, Nora is doing well.  She had her two month appointment last week as well as an ultrasound for her hips.  I am a little bit nervous for the results, and hope that everything still looks fine. In terms of her stats, she is now 23.5 inches long and weighs 11.5 pounds.  She is in the 95% for length and 60% for weight.  Tall and skinny (a bit unlike her sister who was quite chubby!).

And Riley has quite the personality these days. She is chatting up a storm, and we are just eating it up. She is so much fun to listen to!  She is determined to learn the words for everything in her environment, and repeats the things we tell her.  She still has some very bizarre versions of words that take a lot of work for us to figure out!  I finally figured out yesterday that her word for macaroni and cheese is something along the lines of "narose." She clearly is picking up on a few sounds in those words and repeating the ones she remembers. She is also understanding possessive words - certain things are "mommy's," " daddy's" and "baby's." Language development is just so interesting!  And she has started to string a few words together...  her favorites are "baby burped" and "baby toot" - she is very entertained by Nora's bodily functions apparently.








It is such a relief to finally start to communicate with Riley, but she does get extremely frustrated when we don't understand her.  She is also using "mine" a LOT... it was terrifying the first time she grabbed something from me and said it.  





Not surprisingly, Nora is already a better sleeper than Riley.  Nora really is a rockstar, and typically sleeps from about 9 until 3am.  It is incredible.  And Riley has been waking up around 1:30 almost every night, and is an absolute BEAST to put back down.  Charley and I are at our breaking point with that...



(The girls' cousins in their annual cousin photo)

We are heading to LA next week with the whole family!  A friend of mine is getting married, so we are taking this opportunity to go visit my brother (and aunts, uncles and cousins who live there) and introduce them to baby Nora.  My parents are flying down to meet us and help watch the girls while we go to the wedding, and most of friends will be there as well.  

I've definitely been having a hard time not being able to share Nora with my west coast friends and family recently, so this trip will be nice.  It is pretty difficult not to have some of the people I am closest with around to watch the changes my girls are going through and not be able to experience this time with me.  There really isn't much of a solution other than visits (and I am lucky because Charley is amazing at orchestrating trips), so it gets to me some times.  

Hopefully the girls will cooperate on the flight...

Overall, things are good! Happy two months Nora!




 

 

 

 

 























Saturday, August 30, 2014

One Month

Nora - One Month Old

I can't believe it - we are already measuring in months, not days or weeks.  And all I can say is time is of the essence with this post because this is (literally) the first time both babies have napped at the same time.

Nora is doing wonderfully.  After two weeks in her brace her doctor said her hips were fine!  She now just wears her brace at night as a retainer, and will be completely out of it within a week. When he told us this, I think both Charley and I welled up with tears.  We had prepared ourselves (more or less) for months of treatment, so it was a complete shock when he said that the brace had already done its job.  I just feel so thankful that our pediatrician caught her hip dysplasia so early... if they had caught it any later, she would certainly be in the brace and could be looking at months of wearing it.

When they took it off in the office, she stretched every last bit of her body for a solid 10 seconds, and then it seemed like her personality changed and became bigger and bolder.  It sounds bizarre, but both Charley and I immediately felt intimidated by our sweet little Nora who all of a sudden started to make herself known.

She is a pretty good sleeper at this point.  She wakes up quite a bit to eat at night, but she does tend to go down somewhat easily after she is done.  The nights are long, but I'm thankful that I am not bouncing and rocking the entire time as I did with Riley.  Nora's days are a little challenging though because she really dislikes being set down unless she is sound asleep.  She cries in the swing and bouncy chair until she is picked up, which isn't easy to do with another baby to chase after.  I am using the front pack a LOT.

For me, the transition to managing two has been tough. I think the logistics are what I struggle with the most.  How do I pick Riley up off of the table (she climbs on the table when we aren't looking) when I'm holding a screaming Nora?  How do I make Riley lunch while I'm nursing Nora?  How do I shower without subjecting Nora to a roaming Riley?  It really is tricky!  Nora pooped up to her neck the other day and somehow managed to get it on her face, which meant she needed a bath immediately.  As I was giving her a bath upstairs, Riley lost interest in the distraction I gave her and started climbing up the stairs (which she isn't good at yet).  Which was less dangerous?  Leaving an infant in a tub, or letting a wobbly toddler attempt the stairs?  

My other struggle is dealing with the repercussions of spending long chunks of time with the girls on my own.  Charley works long hours (although he has managed to come home on the earlier side recently, thank God) so I am alone with the girls from about 7am to 7pm. I love being a stay at home mother, but it is a long shift and it tests my patience.  Riley likes to push the limits (surprise surprise), and after saying no or stop so many time throughout the day, my words kind of lose their power with her.  I have to choose my battles (and there are quite a few to choose from) which means there are a lot of half eaten snacks around my floor, wallets emptied, refrigerator doors open... Sometimes it is hard to feel like a good or successful mother when you don't have a whole lot to show for it at the end of the day.  At least I keep them alive and fed, right? Even if it is off of grapes and gummy snacks?

Our evenings are the diciest time of day.  My energy is gone, Nora is fussy, and Riley is cranky.  Charley walks through the door and it really is go time until one goes to sleep... and even then we have to pass Nora back and forth until one of us is able to calm her down.  

I think we might need to instate date night ASAP.

Riley has become such a kind, gentle big sister.  She loves to give Nora her blankets and pacifier (and will shove it in her mouth until she takes it... or gags), shush her in the bouncy chair, and try to pick her up.  She calls Nora Wora and baby, and gets very worried when she cries.  She reacts negatively to attention directed at Nora much less frequently, and it is usually when she is just tired and needs a hug or a nap.

Also, Riley is in her parrot phase and is repeating everything we say (with her own version of some words).  Our favorite ones at the moment are "cheers" (cherz), "got it" (got got), "night night" (noy noyt) and "poop" (pooooooooop).  Language development is amazing and so much fun.

Overall, we are getting through this transition and I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel.  And when I hold my sweet, snoozing baby or laugh with my witty, communicative toddler, I know it is all worth it.

I am way behind in the photo taking department, but I am working on it. I am trying to get a good picture of Nora with her eyes open for a monthly stat photo!
















Nora's Newborn Photos















Saturday, August 2, 2014

Nora Frances - One Week Old

Sweet Baby Nora
And just like that we are a family of four.  On Friday, July 25th we welcomed our sweet little girl into the world and all of our hearts grew a little bit bigger. Life has been a busy blur of emotions since that day, and I hope I can capture it.

First and foremost, I can not imagine a better birth than Nora's.  Although Riley's was very normal and resulted in a healthy little munchkin, it was long, intense and painful.  Nora's on the other hand was quick and wonderfully painless. 

The day did not have the smoothest start.  My induction was scheduled for 7:30am, and after calling the hospital I was informed that there was a massive influx of babies being delivered that morning and it would be postponed for a while.  They eventually called back and said that if we rushed in they could take me as long as no other mothers arrived before I did. I was such a mess of nerves at that point (and hadn't slept a wink the night before) that I would have given anything to get it over with.  Needless to say, we rushed out the door.  

We were in our labor and delivery room by 9, but it took two more hours of waiting and staring at each other before they finally hooked my IV up and started the pitocin.  And then the waiting game only got worse.  Every 20 minutes or so the nurse would increase the amount of pitocin, but nothing, literally nothing, was happening.  I have never wanted to feel pain so much in my life!  Charley and I also felt like the nurses weren't doing much to move me along, which was just frustrating.  By 3pm, after four hours of pitocin with very few contractions, I lost it.  I started to doubt that the baby was supposed to be born, and felt that the induction was a bad idea.  Worse than the feeling of a failed induction, I missed Riley so much it hurt. Saying goodbye to her that morning was brutal, and my doubts in the process only amplified my feelings. Charley was doing everything possible to talk me off the ledge, but I was definitely losing it.

Then, just when I was about to ask them to take the IV out and send me home (which they obviously wouldn't do, but I thought I'd try), a doctor strolled in with a smile and told me they were going to get things moving.  Apparently there was a never ending wave of cesarean sections that morning and every doctor was tied up so the nurses were probably holding me off until things slowed down. 

So around 4:30 they broke my water, and by 5:30 I had an epidural put in.  And that is when I realized that the epidural I got with Riley simply didn't work, because this one was amazing.  I basically smiled and laughed my way through the next two hours of labor, and then after a few painless pushes Nora was born at 7:36pm weighing 8lbs 4oz and measuring 20 inches long.  It was perfect, and I am so thankful to have had such a good experience.  I remember looking at Charley several times and saying that this was unbelievable and I didn't believe that this could be childbirth.  It was such a positive experience that I actually said I would be okay having another baby minutes after Nora was born.  After Riley was born I think I said never, ever, ever again.

My first thought (and Charley's as well) when meeting our new little girl was that she seemed so incredibly sweet.  Everything about her just seemed so tender and gentle. So when Charley and I finally got to talking about names and the list of ideas we had, it was such an easy decision to go with Nora.  Our other names seemed too dramatic or strong... Nora was the perfect fit.  

Nora's middle name was also a no-brainer. Charley's grandfather Francis "Fran" Fitzgerald is a pillar in his life (and many others') and we couldn't think of another person we'd want to pay tribute to more.  The only thing left to determine was whether we go with the feminine spelling "Frances" or stick with Fran's spelling to the letter.  This was an easy decision - we would go with the "es" just like Charley's cherished Aunt Frances.

So welcome to the world sweet baby Nora!  Thank you for such a seamless entrance!

But life with a toddler and a newborn is anything but seamless. 

I knew it would have a big impact on Riley, but I couldn't have imagined how.  Whenever I nurse Nora, Riley becomes an emotional, sobbing puddle and it shatters my heart.  She doesn't understand what nursing is to begin with (maybe she thinks it hurts me?), but she really doesn't understand why my attention is elsewhere.  If she acted mad or frustrated, it'd be more manageable, but she acts hurt and sad... This is one of the biggest hurdles for me right now.  In a way it reminds me of the pain of sleep training - I'm putting my child through something incredibly difficult for a positive outcome in the long run... but the short term is so hard to handle.  I wish I could explain how hard it is to see her crocodile tears, but I don't have words for it.

Another thing that has been a bit of a challenge is our little Nora.  Not because she is a tough baby (she is anything but that...), but because she was diagnosed with hip displasia when she was born.  Apparently the position she was in inside the womb kept her hips from correctly connecting to the sockets.  I actually remember thinking it was bizarre that she was in the exact same position after each ultrasound, especially since Riley moved around constantly.  Nora just settled herself in a little too early and now has a bit of a tough road ahead of her.  On Tuesday we met with an orthopedic doctor and they immediately put her in a brace.  The brace goes from her shoulders to her toes, and keeps her hips in the right position to develop correctly.  She has to be in the brace 24 hours a day, and has to wear it for 6 weeks to 6 months depending on her progress.  

We are beyond thankful that we caught it early - if it went under the radar, she would have ended up with multiple surgeries and casts.  However, we are still adjusting to a routine with a newborn with an extra set of needs.  She can only wear onesies without legs, can't be bathed (except for the occasional sponge bath), can't be in certain positions when nursing or being held, etc.  Diaper changes take three times as long, and clothing changes are a very big ordeal.  In the grand scheme of things though, this is a minor issue in comparison to what so many other parents and babies go through.  We have to go to Children's Hospital for her orthopedic appointments, and it is gut wrenching to see some of the things that these innocent little angels go through, and their heartbroken parents trying to be strong.  I can't imagine...  

It is too early to tell what kind of baby Nora will be, but she has been such a good baby so far.  She loves being snuggled and held, but is also perfectly content being set down in her swing or bassinet.  She doesn't need to be bounced or swaddled to sleep (thank goodness because we can't swaddle her anyways!).  She barely cries, and when she does it is only because she is hungry or needs a diaper change so her crying is very short lived.  She is incredibly easy going and I don't think we could ask for much more.  

It really is taking a village to manage day to day life - both of my parents are here and there are moments when we are all a little overwhelmed by the tasks at hand.  Next weekend will be our first weekend as a foursome, and then that Monday I'll be on my own with two.  I know people do it... I just can't imagine how yet!

Well, one week down!  We love our little family more and more every day.  Happy one week Nora :)






 We are still working on a picture of Riley with the baby...  it has proven to be a difficult task.















Oh yeah...  not that I want to compare my daughters, but it is insane how similar they look!!! We took a look at the first few posts I put up of Riley and it is difficult to distinguish between the two at times.